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Ashley Williams

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I'm a Sagittarius, i want to major in Archeology/Anthropology.
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May 13

Zodiac

Zodiac After Sex Comments
 
 
Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!"
 
Taurus: "I'm hungry... pass the pizza."
 
Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"
 
Cancer: "When are we getting married?"
 
Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?"
 
Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets."
 
Libra: "I liked it if you liked it."
 
Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you."
 
Sagittarius: "Don't call me... I'll call you."
 
Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"
 
Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"
 
Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?"
April 24

TILA TEQUILA VS. NATALIE PORTMAN!

 
 
VS.
 
 
 
 
ClOSE CALL!...
 
April 20

THE LANDLORD

 
April 10

POP LOCK AND DROP IT

  
  
 
THE ORIGINAL!!
I practice this dance in the mirror!
March 22

Bruce Lee!

Bruce Lee has been my hero since i was a kid! ^_^ I LOVE HIM! I even have his hur cut!
 
 
 
 
  
 
BEAT THAT ELVIS IMPERSANATIN MUTHA FUKA BRUCE LEE!!!
March 16

Samurai Champloo Gang Starr

  
March 13

Samurai Champloo

  
March 13

Humorous Horoscopes!

 

 

HUMEROUS HOROSCOPES

AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a jerk.

PISCES (Feb 19 - Mar 20)
You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the F.B.I. or the C.I.A. You have minor influence on your friends and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence.

ARIES (Mar 21 - Apr 19)
You are the pioneer type. You are quick tempered, impatient, and scornful of advice. You are a prick.

TAURUS (Apr 20 - May 20)
You are practical and persistent. You have dogged determination and work like hell. Most people think you are stubborn and bullheaded. You are nothing but a goddam Nazi.

GEMINI (May 21 - June 21)
You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you are bisexual. You are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are a cheap bastard.

CANCER (June 22 - July 22)
You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems which makes you a sucker. You are always putting things off. That is why you will always be on welfare and won't be worth a shit. Everyone in prison is a Cancer.

LEO (July 23 - Aug 22)
You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are an idiot. Most Leos are bullies. You are vain and cannot tolerate honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting.

VIRGO (Aug 23 - Sept 22)
You are the logical type and hate disorder. This shit-picking is sickening to your friends. You are cold and unemotional. Virgos make good bus drivers and pimps.

LIBRA (Sept 23 - Oct 23)
You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. If you are male, you're probably queer. Chances for employment and monetary gain are nil. 

SCORPIO (Oct 24 - Nov 21)
The worst of the lot. You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You shall achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. You are a perfect son-of-a-bitch.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 - Dec 21)
You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you have no talent. The majority of Sagittarians are drunks. You are not worth the time of day.

CAPRICORN (Dec 22 - Jan 19)
You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You are basically chickenshit. There has never been a Capricorn of any importance. You should kill yourself.

March 01

My Guilds Quote Thread!

Lexion: Yeah, the power of an ocean cannot stop me! He said before he drowned in icey cold salt water
 
Me: Ya, than you would haunt me!
 
Lexion: Nah, I would watch you naked while you showered and cover you in eckotoplasm
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
 
Me: You gotta fuck a few fatties to get into heaven!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
 
Me: Are you... alone?
 
Kable: Yes
 
Me: What are you wearing?
 
Kable: A pair of basketball shorts and a long sleeve T
 
Me: not acceptable, try again
 
Kable: OK, just the T
 
Me: Try harder!!
 
Me: something seski! lol
 
Kable: nothing
 
Me: good enough...
 
Kable: Can i put my clothes back on now?
 
Me: Sure
 
Kable: Your prolly wearing a jogging suit
 
Me: Actually i am
 
Kable: I'm outside your window bitch!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
 
MATURE 18+
I gave this link to Kable and....
 
Me: Hmmm.... theres a hole in your panties
 
Kable: Is that coochie i see?
 
Me: Think so
 
Kable: Nice find!........It is!! Camel toe!!! I see it!!!
 
Me: relax my friend... relax
 
Kable: LOL, she prolly dont even know and the photographer is like "fuck it" and takes the pics anyways
 
Kable: and she is wondering "why does he have a boner? its not like he can see anything"
 
Kable: WRONG BITCH!
 
Kable: The whole crew is prolly like "oh shit!"
 
Too funny!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Talking about Kables pinkeye/stye/snottingeye!
 
Kable: u knew you gave this to me
 
Me: actually i think its something... just going around
 
Kable: your prolly gonna give me bird flu next!
 
Kable: stay away from me your diseased!
 
Me: gimme hug peez?
 
Me: *staggers towards you*
 
Me: come on!!! .......bear hug
 
Kable FUK NO!!!!!!!!!!!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I play all kinds of games with these guys from FEAR to COV and they are just HILLARIOUS!!!! We talk on ventrilo and i crack up!! I plan on meeting them, im going to sweden this summer to met Lexion..and go sky diving like ive always wanted! Ill probably go flordia to met the Kable guy too :P If you want info...
 
OH heres another funny quote!
 
Lexion: I am coming over and peeing on your door knob
 
 
Kable: misterman wheres your sister?
 
Misterman: NO Kable your not doing anything with my sister!
 
Kable: come on man im only 10 yrs older than her
 
 
Lexion: Yes your sending my fuckin poptarts finally!! all i want is my poptarts
 
Kable: you sound more excited about the poptarts than the IPOD you just bought
 
Lexion: i would be even more excited eating the poptarts off your mom!
 
Kable: Lex...
 
Lexion: What?
 
Kable: shut da fuck up
 
Lexion: .....stoopid Pollack
 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Me: nah, its no biggie.. i can always get the game later.
 
Kable: Yeah, its just a game ashley god!
 
Me:  OMFG!!!!!!!!!! WHERE THE FUCK IS THIS GAME!?!?! IM GONNA SHIT MYSELF!!!
 
Kable: eewwwwww
 
Me: aaaarrrrrggggggg it burns!!!!!
 
Kable: go clean your shorts!!
 
Me: THE PAIN,LIFE SUCKS
 
Kable: ......ya and than there was kable
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
 
Kable: this sucks, i think i have a stye... its snotting and it hurts!
 
Me:
 
Kable: come lick it out!
 
Me: EEEWWW GAWD! thats fuckin nasty as hell!
 
Kable: cmon
 
Me: ....ah alright  *lick*
 
Kable: hahaha, wish it was that easy to get you to do everything...
 
Me: what are you refering to?
 
Kable: Letting me give you a dutch oven.
A dutch oven - is when you are in bed with your spouse, fart... put their head under the covers and they breath in the fumes!
 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
 
Me: Theres a Chupacabra outside my window and he wants to dance wit me!
 
Me: Whaaaa... whats this?!?! OH GAWD, now hes rubbing his nipples and making faces!
 
Me: Why is there a chupacabra outside my window rubbing his nipples?!?!?!
 
Kable: You trippin or something?
 
Me: ridiculous......... so anything interesting happen lately?
 
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
 
Lexion: Well, men have generic things we do aswell... men are like
 
Lexion: "Why should i buy a new shirt, the hole in this one i can cover up with my jacket".... or...
 
Lexion: "Woah! Now i can pretend i had 3 arms but one got amputated and i kept the shirt as memorabilia!"
 
Me: HAHAHAHA!!!
 
Lexion: Just accept the fact that having 3 arms could be good now and then
 
Me: No i wont!
 
Lexion: Say uncle!
 
Me: NO!
 
Lexion: Say it! I'll tickle you till you pee your pants
 
Me: No! *smacks nose* Bad Lex!
 
Lexion: Thats it, your getting out of control.... im fetching the cattle prod.
January 14

Funnies!! :D

 
~Audiorebirth~
 
uhh... thats something people usually inturpt themselves :P but ill tell you how i see it. :)
 
"Mother is the name for God on the lips & hearts of all children"
Children are very loving, so the love of when they SAY "mother" they mean "love" like the love they feel for God.
 
"The road to hell is paved with good intentions"
Some decisions you make are MASKED as good intentions, but in actuality they are misleading, distructive, and cause more damage than you intended. Or you have the right intention but your made the wrong decision. I tried :P
 
~Lifeisdeath~
 
:) that dog is so mad cute! Thanks for posting that pup, i put it on my funnies now. I know what you mean about the penguin, i still stare and laugh at it ...ill be safe :) and ill keep running.
 
 
June 07

Perception

What we see around us is not real

it is only perception

therefore reality is beyond perception

perception deluded us to illusion

illusion is a normal state of mind that percieves the world around us

the world is not what we percieve

the pain that is constant is the pain we tolerate